Job

That's Job the man, for whom the 18th book of the Old Testament is named. You know, the guy who had it all, then lost it all, then got it all back again? I find my thoughts drifting to his story when life gets especially hard - when it all piles up and I start to wonder how we'll survive and how long we can stand it and will it ever pass; or when I hear of multiple friends who are trying to keep their heads above water through their own storms; or both...

Job's story is encouraging to me, believe it or not. Not because his plight was so much more dire than my own. And not because he gets back everything he lost - times two. And not because his well-meaning but self-righteous friends were told by God in no uncertain terms to zip it (though that's pretty satisfying)... I love how he's not afraid to question God, to be perfectly honest about his dismay and fear and doubt and confusion and anger and pain. And I love how, after 39 chapters of being silent, God finally speaks. Speaks directly to Job. Interestingly enough, it's not words of love or grace or comfort or peace that He speaks. The string of rhetorical questions that God fires off at Job comes together to paint a compelling picture of God's power, His authority, His supremacy. And that gives me hope.

I mentioned in my last post that God has recently given me a gift for which I've waited and longed for, and for which I'm beyond grateful. It was about a month ago that God gave me my very first song; the tally now sits at 17. (I write that very calmly, but my heart would add "say what?!!!?" :) ) To be able to sing my own thoughts and words and melodies out to God is one of the most beautiful and intimate joys I've ever known. The other night, when life was weighing particularly heavily and it really seemed as though we just couldn't take one more thing going wrong, I sat down with my pencil and notebook, and this is what resulted. It's the first and only song I've written from God's perspective, and it encouraged me so much that I just have to share the lyrics with you. May it give you a bit of hope and peace and joy.

I Will Carry You

(by Joy Feltmate - isn't that crazy?!)

The battle rages fierce

Your strength is fading fast

You can't imagine how on earth

Your faith will ever last

Hope has gone away

Despair and doubt move in

All seems lost, fear smothers joy

Impossible to win

I will carry you

In My arms you'll find rest

I'll be your shelter, be your shield

When you face the test

I will carry you

Your good Shepherd I will be

I will sustain you through the trial

When you come to Me

My power for when you're weak

Grace when you've reached your end

My precious one, My great delight

I have called you Friend

My love will never fail

Child, you can trust My ways

I'll hold you up when you can't stand

Be with you all your days

I will carry you

In My arms you'll find rest

I'll be your shelter, be your shield

When you face the test

I will carry you

Your good Shepherd I will be

I will sustain you through the trial

When you come to Me